Australia! The land where men are men and sheep are scared!And just about every dangerous creature on the planet make its home in, including the deadly Goon box!
I can safely summarise my time in Sydney as it was all pretty much the same thing for 3 straight days. Drink, have a couple more and think about it, then drink some more! After my hectic last couple of days in NZ, I was hoping to do some real tourist stuff like actually SEE Sydney, but it turns out my mates there had their own ideas...
So for those 3 days of madness I would like to thank the Sydney crew of Steve, Ted, Fred, Mich, Mags, Ang, new edition Ed, and the others that joined in along the way. I had a great time and look forward to returning the favour the next time they pass through mud island looking for a 'quiet couple and thats it...!'Oh, forgot to mention, I have a new player with me by now, Sue my older and 'wiser' sister. Over for a break from work and the much loved English winter!
From here on in it was one big blur of a trip up the coast (3.600 miles along the east coast) . We'd have liked to have had at least another 3 weeks to see things but time was not on our side, and nor was money - Oz is expensive!
So we did the backpacker thing of booking the whole itinerary through a travel agent and getting around on the hop on and off Greyhound buses. It looked to work out alot cheaper in the long run but all the 'hidden' expenses along the way kinda made us doubt it.
First stop was Byron Bay. I had loved this place last time I came through, although that was just a vague memory of a Goon box or ten (cheap nasty wine)! We only had one day and night there so we hit the beach for much of the morning, Goon box in hand of course, popped by the pub for a couple of the local brew on the way back to the hostel, and then decided as we are old farts now I 'nana'nap would do us good to allow us maximum party time that night. We got into bed at 5ish and woke up, almost late for our bus, the next morning!! Goon 1 Us 0.Sue did a very impressive run from the hostel to catch the Greyhound bus while I searched the hut for my wallet, of course it was in my pack all the time. We made the bus, gave a solid high-5 and sweated for the next 30kms! Crisis!
Next stop was Noosa Heads. Great little beach spot although quite a yuppy looking place. Lots of really big expensive houses and shops. The main beach was pretty good, not good for surfing but had a great fish and chippy and that counts for everything! We took a couple of kayaks up the river to the rivermouth and made the old schoolboy error or forgetting little things called 'rip currents'. I'd say the paddled forward in the same spot for a good 10mins before we noticed and made a beeline across it. Strewth mate!
We had another quiet night that evening, the old livers were still bleeding away! Next morning was a sad one for some - ENG getting kicked out of the European champs, hoorah - and a glorious one for everyone in Scotland!
Onto Hervey Bay, our gateway to Fraser Island. A dingo got me baby....
Hervey Bay itself is quite a hole, very industrial and not much to do outside of your hostel. We stayed at Kookaburra Backpackers who were OK. Clean, had a pool, SKY TV and a laundry. Whatelse does one want in life?!
Fraser Island - Awesome!!! I did it last time and this time round was just as cool. The weather wasn't the best, we did get rained on at crucial times - like putting up tents and dinner, and climbing Indian Heads to get the classic pic, and lunch on the first day, and, and, and! So yeah, it pretty much rained most of the time, but we did get some great sunny bits on the all important Lake McKenzie, Lake Wabby, and the old ship wreck on the beach. 
Our hired 4x4 had 9 people aboard, and a very cool bunch. We were'nt the most efficient when it came to cooking and cleaning, but we took the drinking as much Goon as humanly possibly prize - hands down!
Goon 2 Us 0.
- the side effects of downing 1/2 litre of goon in one go...
From Hervey Bay we did the long haul over night bus all the way up to Airlie Beach. This is the port for the Whitsunday Islands where we had a 3 day-2 night trip booked. We left our bags at the agents office and joined the gang, which to our surprise was 53 other people!
We had pictured our boat being this nice small yaught type thing but instead we were on a huge single hull 'sailing boat'. The sail might have gone up once or twice but the engine still powered us along. This said, the trip itself was really cool. We had a great bunch of people on the boat, and although there were so many we never felt cramped at all. Boat name is Atlantic Clipper incase anyone is keen one day ..
Of course as expected, Whitehaven Beach took the cake for being the highlight of the trip - unless of course we want to include 10 of us singing samba and Christmas tunes as we march round and round, drunk as farts in the boats hot-tub', and have the last man to find a seat when the singing stops go up to the front of the boat and sing 'my heart will go on''...
When there are drunk irishmen involved, you cannot write off anyform of debauchery!!! Nice one John, Shane, Marvin and James!!!Goon 3 Us 0!
From Airlie beach - which of course included a farewell drinks session, karaoke included and late night flicking of hoof at the local ''discotech'' - we went to Magnetic Island for a couple of days to relax and re-cooperate. First night was a complete success. We managed to crash by 10pm after a very civilised dinner and 2 very poor games of pool.
The second night was not!!! We met an English couple in our dorm room and joined them for a couple of cold ones after dinner. This moved on to the beach where games of 5's kicked in, some skinny dipping, then off to the hotel pool as the fear of getting stung by jellyfish overtook the beercoats! A security guard spotted us after the whittest bum competition and we ran like bats out of hell in all directions! After years of TV, I put into practice the old hold-your-breath-under-water-and-they-''-never-see-you move - and it worked. Others tried leaping over the back fence and would have got away injury free if only they had done the reliable tuck and roll manoevre! Well, the security guard let them go in the end and we all hobbled off to bed.
There is no such thing as "a couple of drinks!!"
Very tired and hungover we made our way up to Cairns where I stayed with my mate Kirby I met in Africa. What do you do when you haven't seen someone for a long time, that's right - drink beer!! My liver started to bleed again! Aidez-moi! He did make arguably the best burger -in THE WORLD - for us that night though...
Sue and I signed up for a days trip out to the Great Barrier reef - when in Rome.. - and found ourselves on one of those huge pack as many people on a boat as possible and have a jolly old time kinda trips. Whata mistaka to maka! I got to see some cool coral and a shark and turtle or two, but the overly excited ship entertainer could have done with some lead poisoning. Man-it-was-painful. I did win a couple of fizzy drinks when he did a sing-a-long, guess the band gig!
Back to Cairns and our last night was a pretty chilled one at a hostel. We got some washing done, internet, phone calls, all the admin.
Oz is over, in a total blur! Great times though and thanks to all that made it so enjoyable. And sorry to all we didn't see and we shot past your town in a blur of Greyhound!
Next up....S.E ASIA... o boy!
